Is Fear To Be Feared?

This is basically an account of something I witnessed on my way home. Initially I was pissed off at the seat I was able to secure on the bus. It was one of those 18-seater buses where everyone is squeezed together like bread and akara, and God help you if, of all the four passengers on your seat, you’re the only slim-fitted person. Fortunately, this was not my case, but I wasn’t totally comfortable all the same. 

I had to sit on the last row (a major disadvantage when the time came to alight at my stop) and the vehicle was missing one window. So my seat was quite exposed. That meant I was quite exposed! When you’re in traffic at Mile 12, you want to use your phone and you have your bag with you, that situation is NOT cool! It wouldn’t take the dumbest thief anything to snatch my bag.

You can guess that all these put me in a mood not suitable for observation of any kind; I just wanted to get home! But then, some things just come out of the blues and surprise you… little did I know that my ‘unfortunate’ seat would give me a vantage viewing position of the drama that was to set my thinking wheels rolling.

We all know how much of a commotion traffic in Lagos can be; what with ‘agberos’*, unruly drivers and dare-devil motorcyclists (Yes, I mean ‘okada’ men) all trying to prove king of the road. It was in the midst of that commotion that one Northern man was trying to cross the road. Out of nowhere, an ‘okada’ appeared and hit him, almost knocking him down. The man was pretty shocked; mouth agape at the unfortunate incident that was about to befall him. He must have heard the laughter from other people on the road, because he instantly turned into a braggadocio, insulting the motorcyclist who was long gone.

That action proved to be unwise; he wasn’t concentrating and just as he made to cross the road again, hoping to weave in between the thick traffic, another ‘okada’ hit him! My bus was on the other lane but I heard people’s laughter loud and clear. I also heard the Northern man’s words clearly: dan boro ba! He was visibly angry, but only after I’d caught the look of extreme fear on his face.

Though fleeting, that look was unmistakable. And it got me thinking: "Why the hesitation to display our fears? Why does everyone hate to be perceived as weak or vulnerable?" Everyone wants to have the last word. Initially, my first answer was “It’s the Lagos spirit”. Afterall, Lagos is the place where everyone has to “shine your eye”- The woman who clutches her bag to herself in a grip of death whenever any passers-by brush against it- she fears that the next man on the street is out to steal from her; The average man does not trust the other because he’s scared of being a victim.

More than ever before, our actions and inactions are motivated by fear. What I do not really understand is why we all automatically express our fears through anger and frustration.

What is it about fear that we fear so much?........

*agbero: Touts usually found on major roads in Lagos…

*dan boro ba: Hausa language; An insult on a person’s father